He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
