He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
