fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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