i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
