She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
