At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize