i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
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