i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
