i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
