K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
