I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
