so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
