Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
