So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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