Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
