I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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