I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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