The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Randomize
