so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
