I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Someone shattered a urinal.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
