Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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