I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
