It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
