I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
