i don't like sucking hair
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
