so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
