Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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