My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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