FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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