He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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