I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
it's great music for shaving your balls
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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