Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
