try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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