White coat. Heels.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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