She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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