Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
