About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize