i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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