if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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