im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
