NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Welp...herpes.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
