Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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