Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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