69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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