I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
