i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
