quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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