I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Randomize
