party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
