I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
